stop and stare

Sometimes we thought we'd came a long way and couldn't remember where are we heading,
that's when we should stop and stare.
Why do I like this song so much?
Maybe it's because I'd come to a stage where I should stop and review of myself,
and this song just came along at the right timing.
And now,I'm all satisfied again,with my full stomach ^^
And heck,I'm still coughing after one week. I hate the liquid medicine.

我回家了

吐了两口很大的痰出来，喉咙顿时舒服多了。带着少许血丝的痰，埂在喉咙多天，终于出来了~
回到家，就是懒散，什么事都懒惰了，吃药也有妈妈喂,呵呵~我是长不大的小孩~
放假前总是有很多的计划，放假时却未必会实践。
两个月前的邂逅，没有了下文。
我知道我的弱点。

有些事情，
还是不听不闻不看不知比较好。
何必去挖自己的伤口呢？　

对她们来说，
我是不够成熟，
总是要求太多，像个小孩。
有谁愿意照顾一个想保护却又想被照顾的小孩？

Stop and Stare- One Republic

Stop and Stare---One Republic
From the album-Dreamin out loud
Tabbed by Sanjeev and Thomas George Varghese Contact us at sanjeevgeorge123@yahoo.co.in

CAPO 4th fret

Intro C-----------Em

VERSE 1
C
This town is colder now, I think it's sick of us
Em
It's time to make our move, I'm shakin' off the rust
C
I've got my heart set on anywhere but here
Em Am
I'm staring down myself, counting up the years
F
Steady hands, just take the wheel
Am
And every glance is killing me
F
Time to make one last appeal for the life I lead

CHORUS

C
Stop and stare
G
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Am
Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared
F F G
But I've become what I can't be, oh

C
Stop and stare
G
You start to wonder why you're 'here' not 'there'
Am
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
F
But fair ain't what you really need
F C
Oh, can you see what I see?

VERSE 2

(Same Pattern of chords as for verse 1)

They're tryin' to come back, all my senses push
Untie the weight bags, I never thought I could
Steady feet, don't fail me now
Gonna run till you can't walk
Something pulls my focus out
And I'm standing down


C
Stop and stare
G
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Am
Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared
F F ( G-Optional)
But I've become what I can't be, oh
C
Stop and stare
G
You start to wonder why you're 'here' not 'there'
Am
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
F
But fair ain't what you really need
G C
Oh, you don't need

Em Am F
Oh Oh Oooooo
G
What you need, what you need, what you need

ENDING
C
Stop and stare
G
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Am
Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared
F G
But I've become what I can't be, oh
C
Oh, do you see what I see?

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/tabs/o/onerepublic/stop_and_stare_ver4_crd.htm

伤心

Guai Guai is a turtle,1 of my first pet turtle that survived,but he acted like a dog.
He can recognized his own name and reacted on it,he crawled freely around the house,he scratched door and made noise when he wanted to enter a room,he followed behind me when i walked......
Guai Guai is lost now.....somewhere in the longkang......i hope....
I cried like a kid,yes,for my turtle......

乖乖是只龟，帅气、聪明、可爱的乌龟。
乖乖不见了，离家出走了.......都怪妈妈.......
其实妈妈也很疼乖乖的.........
好，大家都伤心......
乖乖阿,你在哪里?怎么不乖了呢？
找不到了啦....下雨天，水沟水多，又那么多天了...........grrrrr
我嚎啕大哭，哭死我了......
我引以为荣的聪明宝贝龟乖乖不见了....

这个那个,可是但是

我纳闷，我想问清楚，为什么要白费力气搬来搬去。
我想睡觉，可是头发还有点湿。
我想找人发发牢骚，可是没有人鸟我，就算有人，也听不懂我说什么。
我想表现我的自卑，可是其实我四肢健全头脑没有坏掉心肠也不算差。
‘你到底想怎样？？！’， 我对我自己说。
想睡了一整天，没有hyper的状况出现，有脾气暴躁的情况出现，
哦，还有肚子好像有一点饿了。
满肚子怨气的，怨饱算了。

A pregnant man?

A pregnant man?I would say,it's just a person that wants to have his/her own family. How a man get pregnant? Well,I'm not going to say anything,click the links below and watch the youtube yourself.

Interview on oprah:

Advocate, LGBT news site, first person-account of the pregnant man (also the 'related stories from Advocate.com,click by your own):
HERE

Close review and pictures,A LOT OF PICTURES('click for the pictures of...'):

HERE

Most recent news:
HERE

Well?what's your reaction and thoughts? If you read the comments from those linked sites,you'll see a lot of critiques and erm...negative comments. That's normal reaction,when the 'unique' and 'queer' came out public. Abnormal, they said. Some even took it to some extreme, discrimination and verbal abuse.

A family,what a normal dream that most of us had. But it's so difficult, to some of us.

nostalgia

我又要来感叹一下了，啊~~时间飞快啊~~竟然已经离高中生活两年了！！！！当年的小鬼们很快就要重蹈我们这些前辈们的脚印，上考场了，哈哈！大家都说高中的生活最愉快，说得也是。学校就像保护层，杜绝外来社会对在校学生的影响。当然年龄越大，保护层就越来越薄，就靠学生自己的免疫能力了。读书时期是好的，可以光明正大的向父母要钱，学成后找不到工作还要向父母拿钱，厚脸皮。读书时，只管学业，当然感情恋爱课外烦恼，自找的。学成后，要赚钱养家过生活，社会生活的累。还好兄弟还是幸福的，还有自己的兴趣去追随，所以我鼎力支持。

我中学朋友不多，就几个都比较亲的，还继续保持联络。想想升form 4那年，少了两个A,进了中等班，虽然预料之中，可是我心情还是算满落寞的（你看啥学校啊，才差两个A就straight A的还是进了中等班)。 原因就在自小学开始本人的成绩就算不错的，不希罕进第一班，就喜欢流连第二班的没压力优生班（就让我臭屁一下想当年哈~），朋友们一直保持在优先班的成绩内，结果我落班了，感觉就如迷失了方向，力不从心，干脆自暴自弃，哈哈。嗯，回想form 4和form 5那两年虽然没那么自暴得夸张，就是得过且过的态度。噢~离题了，我想说的是，我想念中学的日子哈，尤其是朋友们~

每次回家都会一起出来的四人组。左边开始阿：

ps:我的form 5同桌，可爱的女生，要好好啊！
birdleg：为啥叫鸟脚？因为脚如其名，又长又细，人又够鸟。
亲爱的小明妹妹：小学and中学学妹。也还是毕业后才开始混熟的，原因保密，嘿嘿。总希望被称为美女，可总被人误称为帅哥。唉~


还有我的小学死党，慧跟茹诗，总是没拍到照片。两个都是特优生，话说刚进到UM(University Melaya),慧得会计茹诗得医学，强吧~ 又多了可以看病不用钱的机会了~
还有我的karate gang。宝仪，静茹，凯津，怡秀阿姐阿等等，虽然各奔前程，想当年浩浩荡荡满身臭汗挤一辆车飘洋过海的记忆还是很美好。
还有form3那年很开心的一班，中学最开心的一年就是那年了，3A2，Yee Tong，Hui Ming，家仪，朱先生等等......
还有form4小小圈子的朋友，我的同桌see gian，后座男生Hun Piang和小学同学万事如意先生。话说我认识鸟脚的悲惨生活就是从那年开始的.......

啊可爱的朋友们啊~大家生活过的好就好了~
不论身在何方，都不忘本不忘根。


to mich:translation unavailable due to translator laziness....XD

hyper

夜深邃，
思想跳跃能力太强，
我自己也赶不上节拍。
我说我不够睡会很hyper,
真的~
这个时候的我，
可以自己讲一个故事出来，
然后自己在那边爽，
简单一句就是自言自语自爽自high。

Came across with my past,
我的右手食指还带着戒指，
我新的单身戒指。
送出去的，我后悔过，
因为除了Anizo,就戒指我舍得花。
送戒意义重大，
我不会再把自己的戒指套在别人的手指上了，
我自己发誓。

我喜欢跟姐姐聊天，
善解人意，
让我心情放松了起来。
就是喜欢姐姐，
不为什么，
就因为那天的那个孤单的背影让我印象深刻，
从此留意了。

哎呀爱人姐姐，
你在哪里啊~？
你看，
我幻想了，
我以后的爱人是个姐姐，
哈哈~

感冒了，鼻子堵塞了，
快要生病的感觉。
因为睡眠时间很糟糕了一个星期。
我知道照顾自己的，
因为没有母亲大人没有爱人阿我现在这里。
糟糕的study week，
1st Class Honour weh~~

Anizo again,and AGAIN

YES Anizo again! This is a post all about Anizo, skip this entry if you feel I'm childish,wakakaka~~These are the only toys that I willing to spend money to collect! I don't even spend on clothes tau?!

These are the 6th and 7th series! From the Curve,I think.

One of the 6th series! ‘热血’，not sure if it means the same in Chinese,which means warm blood,active??

Back view: singlet shape

The 7th series,‘怠け者’，looks like a panda,cute right?not sure what it means this 1.

Back view

I was waiting and craving for the 10th series,but what I got the latest are these!

Horoscope Anizo!!Not sure is it a special series or it's the 10th series.But it's cute and special!

Half transparent!nice eh!With description at the front!

My horoscope: Pisces!! The words means 'unstable emotional'!XD true man! So lucky to get my own horoscope!

Back view: 鱼座 with the horoscope sign

This is the Cancer,‘神圣过敏’，means too sensitive I think XD

Back view： 巨座

my last friends

I drank coffee last night and I slept at 10am this morning,wth~ Yea I just woke up,and now my head still heavy and blurry. Yea yea I'm blaming the coffee,I didn't slept last night,so what I did? 'Quan Cheng' la~ Yea actually I shall blog this in Chinese,but chatting with 2 English educated Chinese,makes my blurry brain hard to switch the channel la. So bear with my crappy English.

For me,friendship is not about quantity,but quality. It's good to social and know a lot of people,but what's the point if you have a lot of hi-bye friends,but nobody to talk to when you're down or when you need a hand for you to hold. I'm lucky that I have true friends,friends that really know me,friends that are like my siblings,friends that watch my back when I fall. I have two families, one is where i grew up, another one is my friends that we hold certain common beliefs and I'm willing to share my life with. Friends doesn't just come around,that's why true friends are hard to get. I realize that I have only few straight girl friends that are really closed with me, hard to have common topic. When they talked about guys and fashion,I can't help but ROLLED MY EYES.

I have a dream. I dream that someday,in the future,me and my hengdais,will have our own family,and live under the same roof. Well doesn't have to be in same house,maybe nearby or next door? XD~'Quan Cheng' inspired me, whether it's fiction or real life story.

P/s: 'Quan Cheng' is an online chinese story(novel) that I've been 'following' for years, it's 3rd 'season' now. Neh my link there, 'xyqw-my idols'. By the way,it's in Chinese,XD~

天亮

'Darkness is the source of creativity'
一个在读建筑系的姐姐说的，
我说‘建筑好像不是人读的’。

天亮咯天亮咯~
天亮才入睡已经算是满久前的事。
A memorable night of chatting.
扬扬在玩瑜伽，偶卖糕~

Bad day?

Guess what,my motor broke down when I was on my way to school yesterday morning. First time in my life, vehicle broke down on highway. What to do? Call for HELP la (not my school,the real help!)~

It's a secondhand motorbike,actually it wasn't secondhand. According the the document that came along with the motor when i bought it 4 weeks ago, it's FOURTHHAND! But we still called it a secondhand don't we? XD~
Well you see,it's a 10 years old bike,what do you expect? Although the motor shop uncle ensured me it has been re-polished and proper-checked,some small little parts might still broke down unexpectedly during critical period such as ATTENDING CLASS! XD~
Do not ask me how much I bought it,it's a pain in my ass. Anyway,since it is my second wifey,I'll take good care of it even it's old and worn and slow. YAMAHA Y100 with 100cc, I miss my Nouvo S with 115cc. There's a lot difference between the 15cc!

Ok story continue.

I called the motor shop,asked uncle to saved me,fast,and waited with my broken motor at roadside for 15 minutes. Another mechanic from the motor shop came with Suzuki V100,tried to fix my motor on the spot,failed,so he asked me to use his Suzuki V100 to school,which I did. Funny cute little Suzuki V100,with a back mirrors half a size of normal motor's back mirror,quite nice to drive thou.

I returned the V100 to the shop and got my motor back. According to uncle, he and the other guy brought my motor back to the shop! I totally salute them, quite a distance and it's highway! I have no ideal how they did it,but thanks to uncle, the reparation fee is free.

Lucky or unlucky, I would say that I'm lucky rather than complaining around that my stupid motor broke down bla bla bla.
I'm lucky that there wasn't car driving fast behind me when the motor engine stop functioning,because I was at the middle of the road.
I'm lucky that my sign lamp still working, so I was able to put up signal and push the motor to the roadside.
I'm lucky that my handphone still have some credit and I have the motor shop's phone number.
I'm lucky that KL drivers are not that blind.
I'm lucky that when I sneaked in to the class, Mr. Franklin didn't notice me,although I have reasonable excuse to be late.
And finally,I'm lucky to be alive :)

Learning to be optimistic, learn to appreciate rather than complain.
A bad day isn't just bad,things doesn't happened without a reason,just whether you can spot and learn the lesson or not.

don't worry be happy

Even holiday also got things to worry about -.-''' headache....

Today is Sunday,ok not today anymore,yesterday.
Sunday is study day/labour day~
I sweep,I mop,I wash,I clean,and,I wash again =.=''
Damn line again today,now I know how important is email.
Internet is just so important nowadays that without Internet,we can't get our homework done and have good grades XD~

I worried bout my room,I worried bout my holiday jobs,but I'd forgot to worry about my final exam. Yes you see so many stuff in my head,that's why I need chocolate to ease my headache.

伟人

最近办事不妥，
别人委托给我的事都没有好好完成，
真不懂自己在想什么，
不够醒目。
反省当中。

Mr.Franklin said,
Great people are people that would still happy to help even if they know other people are taking their advantage. Those are willing to sacrifice to serve others,pursuing higher level of purposes. Fool or greatness?
We might be just a fool of our life after all.
伟人是，
就算知道会吃亏，
还是会愿意让别人占尽便宜。
换个说法，
伟人就是笨蛋。
所以很少有华人愿意当伟人。

当伟人，
会被爸爸妈妈骂的，
不要当伟人~
公公教我，
害人之心不可有，防人之心不可无~
我提醒自己要切记，
要先利人，也要后利己。
这是我新的原则，
从现在开始。

Perfume

Personally,I don't really like perfume. I prefer smells of shampoo or Softlan.
I read the book before I go and download the movie,'Perfume:The Story of a Murderer'. It's all about scents and odor,that effects people's thinking. The storyline is quite.......unpredictable and the ending is......so sudden that makes you think 'har?what?finish?the end?'. Scents carry meaning,that's the theme of the story. The moral of the story is a bit hard to catch,you'll have to read it or watch it by yourself.

Right,I do think that when you like someone,or should I say,when you're attracted to someone,you'll be able to detect the odor of the person,even it's sweat smell -.-'' . But most of the time,you'll think that's the most wonderful scent that you ever smell from a person. The odor will implanted on your mind and whenever the person is nearby,you'll feel like the person is just right beside you because you THINK you can smell her odor even she's not really nearby. That's the power of scents. And I forbid myself to let any scent implanted on my mind XD.

19

Just finished reading a friend's blog,she wrote those when she was 19,which is my age now. An older soul than her actual age,she is. Not dare to say that I understand what she'd gone through,but I dare say that I share some common perspectives with her,about the society and the world.

It's hard to convey your thoughts into a deliverable message,
and it's harder to make people understand your thoughts,
without making them feel offensive,
because no two human being share a same brain.
Different background and experiences made up different perspective,
what you think is rational may not be right for another person,
what you think is the truth may sound cruel to another person.
Just like the question 'who am I?',
it depends on how you perceive me.

I might not who I am that you see.

烟酒之地

烟酒之地。
没有震耳欲聋的音乐；
有诚恳的歌声，有好听，也有不好听。
就真的是烟酒之地。
还没进门就被烟味窒息了，进了更是眼睛被烟熏得猛出泪。
那是属于我们的世界，
里面充满了故事。
每个人的生活都比常人不容易，
各职各业的，
常人眼中的怪胎，
每一支烟、每一杯酒、每一个人、每一个故事，
因为性向而聚在同一个地方，
我感觉到安全感。

兄弟染上恶习，
我在想，
如果当时没有介绍她这个世界，
她会不会已经事业有成？
I got sin.

葡萄酸

话说一只狐狸经过一个葡萄树，葡萄看起来很甜很美，狐狸经不起诱惑，于是在葡萄树下徘徊。踮起脚尖，到不到；奋力跳跃，到不到；对着葡萄树grrr，到不到。狐狸累得趴在属下的时候，一只美丽的小鸟轻轻的停在葡萄树枝上，慢慢的享受着葡萄鲜甜的果肉。狐狸羡慕、妒嫉、愤怒、伤心，精疲力尽得来一场空。狐狸安慰自己说，‘没关系，葡萄是酸的啦，说不定甜的葡萄将很快就会自己出现。’ （完）

我没有变态，我是正常的~

'Research has shown that the vast majority of people who attempt suicide
or experience suicidal ideation are feeling depressed, hopeless, or both
(e.g., A. T. Beck, Kovacs, & Weissman, 1979; Brown, Beck, Steer, &.Grisham,
2000).'
借我copy and paste。

1030

I like this song.

internship

Resume改了又改，竟然用了那么多错的语法，英文退步了，还好admin不厌其烦的指正错误。
七月已经没有值得很期待的了。
还是会回家，或许一个星期，如果得到intern的话。

同样的事件一直在重复，
为什么总是这样的呢？
是我的问题。

之前在理智与欲念之间徘徊，灰色地带。
学习当个绅士，要保持风度。

moving out,moving in

我看着她搬进那间屋子，
过后我自己搬进那间屋子，
现在我们一起搬离那间屋子，
finally。

I watched her moved in to that house.
Then,I moved in to that house.
now we both moved out from that house.
Finally.

生活会有所改变，
开销或许会更大了些，
可是又回到了自由身，
不需要再每晚戴耳机了。

There would be some changes,
but I'm myself again,
no more pretending,
I'm out of her life.

Special thanks to awei,jwen and phi~
Pizza is not enough to show my appreciation and thankfulness~

The house that I'm familiar with since years ago,
here I am~
I'm part of the house now~