又看文了

好的小说有影响人的能力。虽然故事里美满的结局是虚构的，可是字字句句作者写出来都来自内心的。

“不用说。这是我自己选择，和你没有关系。”她冲着我笑，心满意足的一份笑。“太多人走不到最后，但是大家还在走。为什么？因为不去走的话，你永远不知道自己 是能走出来的那一对，还是走不出来的那一对。我知道……”她走过来，伸出手，扶在我胸上，“我知道你这里在痛，在滴血，在流泪。我的也是。如果我问你，上 车之前，你明知道这趟车会停在半路，少有可以到达终点的，你还上不上？”

……我不想说话，我想她能猜到我的回答。

“你会选择上。对吧？”我点点头。

“为什么？一是因为，虽然到达终点的车少，但不代表一辆都没有，还有希望可言。”

没错。

“二是，即使车停在了半路，就此中止了，我们为什么还选择上车？”

“因为不上车，就不会看到路上的风景。”我俩，异口同声。

--- 乔拉-《爱到晚年》

虽然，主角们一开始就是被追的那个。
虽然，主角们身高都一米七。

重新复习一遍乔拉写的文，平复了我的情绪，恢复了些理智与希望。
如果考试是靠这些文的话，我会很乐意的背完整篇的故事大纲。
我看文沉迷程度可以不睡不吃不喝不拉。还不拿一百分？？

把回忆连串起来，形成一个故事，然后延续下去。
我想住在回忆里。

I fear of being abandoned.
I hate that feeling.

鬼使神差

毒戒不了。不戒了。早就已经是生活的一部分了。

如此的任性，请原谅我。

为什么让我遇着了却不让我如愿以偿？
请不要回答我说这是上帝给我的一个考验。
考验很多，拿来做么？

最近一直在讨论宗教，尤其是基督。
我尊敬所有宗教，因为不可以冒犯神明，谁知道会后什么后果。
我不信奉任何宗教，可是我相信有Higher Power。
你看看，很多宗教的God如何修成正果都差不多一样的，留下来给信徒的都是差不多一样的。为什么大家的神就不可能是同一个？
不论什么宗教，都是教人如何做个好人，如何尊敬其他生命，所以有宗教是好事。
不过太过极端的信奉宗教就不好了，变成dogmatic。god倒转过来就是dog。要看自己如何辨别衡量，egocentric就不好。

如果我有一天变vegetarian,不知道我妈会什么反应？哈~

You said last time it made you cried.
It did the same to me too.



James Blunt - Goodbye My Lover

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.


Maybe we both felt the same.

Quit

第一次上网后不懂要做什么。

I'm sorry I can't end it in a perfect way. You know this is my way of ending everything.

我在戒毒。 My own personal kind of drug.

Never say never

Never Say Never
Some things we don't talk about
better do without
just hold a smile
we're falling in and out of love
the same damn problem

together all the while
you can never say never
when we don't know why
time and time again
younger now then we were before
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go

picture you're the queen of everything
as far as the i can see
under your command
i will be your guardian
when all is crumbling
steady your hand

you can never say never
when we don't know why
time and time again
younger now then we were before
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go

we're falling apart
and coming together again and again
we're coming apart
but we hold it together
hold it together, together again

don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go(x2)

I am running away.

now everybody say lacha lacha ta ta

as i know,they are now hot in everywhere.
and they ARE hot~
Pretty and cute. And sexy when they dance~
First time i found tb dances girl moves have different kind of style,in a cool way~
Yah babe, i like the way they dance~

生日快乐

气氛很不对,awkward。
Lack of intimacy,陌生的对话。
我累了。

Anyway,
明天有人生日。
生日快乐

如果

酒后清醒，睡不着。
把自己隐藏起来，不让朋友找到。
诉苦后又怎样？
像朋友一样的安慰。
日子还是一样的过，
不开心，还是一样会不开心。
向陌生人诉说对全世界的不满，
会是怎样的一种心情？

break

When you have all these craps in you,
and you still have to take in all these craps,
it's overwhelming.

I was and I am still taking a break.
From everyone. Except you.

Endless story

Endless Story (ENGLISH VERSION):

If you haven't changed your mind
Then I want you by my side Tonight

I'm so tired of always having to bluff
Everytime I think about you baby, I feel so young
If I could just tell you I miss you
It's so hard to say I'm sorry

You see, I want to sing this song, not for just anyone
but just for you
An ENDLESS STORY that keeps on shining
Always, I wanna show you, forever and ever

Memories of our time together
this way, they don't go away

Once I knew that the warmth between us had disappeared,
gentle tears started to spread over my chest
This is not where it ends, I'm missing you
please don't let go of my hand

You see, I wish I could sing this song, just for you
just one more time
An ENDLESS STORY of undying love
tell me why, please tell me, forever and ever

You see, I want to sing this song, not for just anyone
but just for you
An ENDLESS STORY that keeps on shining
Always, I wanna show you, forever and ever

You see, I wish I could sing this song, just for you
just one more time
An ENDLESS STORY of undying love
tell me why, please tell me, forever and ever

can't stop

i am physically and emotionally weak.

i am mad at anything and everything, i mad at the Higher Power for whoever it may, i mad at society,i mad at family, i mad at you and i mad at myself.

i couldn't do anything to change anything.

sometimes reality hurts...painfully.

why is it so hard to get to be with someone you love...

vulnerable

Vulnerable- Secondhand Serenade

Share with me the blankets that you're wrapped in
Because it's cold outside, it's cold out side
Share with me the secrets that you kept in
Because it's cold inside, it's cold inside

And your slowly shaking fingertips
Show that you're scared like me so
Let's pretend we're alone
And I know you may be scared
And I know we're unprepared
But I don't care

Tell me tell me
What makes you think that you are invincible
I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure
Please don't tell me that I'm the only one that's vulnerable
Impossible

I was born to tell you I love you
Isn't that a song already?
I get a B in originality
And it's true I can't go on without you
Your smile makes me see clearer
If you could only see in the mirror what I see

And your slowly shaking fingertips
Show that you're scared like me so
Let's pretend we're alone
And I know you may be scared
And I know we're unprepared
But I don't care

Tell me tell me
What makes you think that you are invincible?
I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure
Please don't tell me that I'm the only one that?s vulnerable
Impossible

Slow down girl, you're not going anywhere
Just wait around and see
Maybe I'm much more ,you never no what lies ahead
I promise I can be anyone, I can be anything

Just because you were hurt doesn?t mean you shouldn't bleed
I can be anyone, anything
I promise I can be what you need

Tell me tell me
What makes you think that you are invincible?
And I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure
Please don't tell me that I'm the only one that?s vulnerable
Impossible

Will you open your heart and let me stay there?
Because you're already here.
(l)(f)

We are so vulnerable...
to get hurt/to fall in love/to die/to get disease/to be separated/to any type of harm physically and emotionally.
So,what makes us so different?
Your God? My god? Your sexuality? Your gender? Your belief? Your culture? Your family background?
Put that apart,we are just normal human being that able to feel love, pain, happy, arousal, sadness......
When we are young, we like freedom, we fool around, we play heartbreaking game;
When we are old, we want someone to be with us. We want stability in life, we want someone that can take care of us.
Why we don't appreciate when there is someone who is willing to be with us, willing to give everything anything to us when we are young?
Well,such is life. Get on with it.

This is a random. I don't know what I'm talking. If you feel I'm talking about you,so yes it is you.

respect

I want to say this: psychology students are not saint. We are human with feelings, and of course we sided our friends when we see them got hurt. Well, I mean I do. Not that I'm not understanding,but how am I suppose to be empathy towards someone who had hurt my friend's feeling. I'm talking about couples. Yes,couple who broke up and the one who got hurt is my dear friend. Of course it is possible that both parties experience some pain but just i didn't get to see another part of the story. But for those who just broke up and get a new partner within a week? Sorry but what I see is you are not respecting the relationship and the person that you had just broke up with. So you just lost my respect.

Sometimes when we pointed our finger at another person,we forgot to look at ourselves.
Please be considerate.
But are yourself being considerate of others?
Am I being considerate?

My room light bulb just stopped working. How am I going to change the light bulb with my height? *sigh*

伤害人的不会懂被伤害的人的痛。
除非伤害人的也曾经被伤害过。

annoyance

Some stupid assholes keep on using PPS by giving excuse that PPS is streaming not downloading. Hell yea PPS IS DOWNLOADING AND STREAMING AT THE SAME TIME YOU STUPID,IT USES P2P SOFTWARE. Oh in case you don't know,P2P means peer-to-peer,which mean you are downloading from others who are downloading the same show. SO YES,YOU ARE EATING UP THE WHOLE HOUSE LINE YOU IDIOTS. And it annoys me! Usually I wouldn't mind if I'm not watching Youtube or finding journals on database. But I am watching this and I can't finish the last part! And this guy doesn't belong to this house anyway!

I love Ellen!XD

I'm going to 'accidentally' switch off the modem after the last part finish streaming.

I don't know what can I do when I finish all videos about Ellen on Youtube.

I'm addicted to you. And you.

research and experiment

Designing a psychology experiment is so not easy!

We spent too many days deciding what kind of experiment to conduct and end up with a simple and boring research idea. We do have research tutor assigned to us to help us with the research design,but we haven't contact our tutor because: either we got too many questions to ask so don't know which one to ask, or we have no idea what to ask at all. I don't even know which one is the reason.

Oh man,I never thought doing a research all by our own is so darn hard. Shall start thinking about what to do for thesis now,XD.

threaten

It is easy for us to talk,but when it really happens,most of us wouldn't do what we said we would do.

Last night,I was playing Lily Allen's 'fxxk you' loudly in my room at 1am. I was printing my notes feeling a bit fed up. Paper ran out, and I went out to get more blank papers. If you been to the place that I'm staying,my room was a small room between kitchen and living room,with window facing outside. As I was getting papers,I thought I saw some movement in the kitchen. Well,the living room's light was off,so from where I was standing it was quite dark. I thought it was just some huge bugs or whatever. But when I turn facing back to my room,I saw someone was walking outside my window! At this late hour and all my housemates were back,of course I got stunned for few seconds before I know what was going on and what to do. I don't really saw the person,what I saw was just a dark figure walking slowly passed by my window toward the back of the house. I ran to the front door and rang the alarm. Of course housemates came out and I told them I saw someone in our house territory. I went out and let off Milky,she picked up some smell outside my window. So for sure someone was outside my window just now,and that kind of thought creeps me out whole night.

After awhile when we all went back into our rooms, I went into kitchen to refill water and I smelled something. It was a scent like perfume in the kitchen. Last time when another housemate saw someone stand at the back of the house, he said he smell something like this as well. Weird yea? It's not just me,Ah Phi smelled it too.

I didn't really get to sleep. I was shocked and scared by the thoughts that while I was asleep someone is just outside my window or in the house. How to sleep when you are feeling insecure and threaten in terms of safety? Criminal is not about can or cannot. It's just about daring. Well,for sure,I'm letting Milky loose these few nights.

And I'm getting a part time job soon.

marriage

I've been watching Ellen's on youtube whole day,can get addicted I tell you.
If I get married,this will be the reason.

So beautiful.

爱情

我回来了。
总是无时无刻的在成长中学习，
随着年纪的增长，记忆中的理想已逐渐模糊。
曾经可以毫无顾忌的大声说爱，以为爱情是唯一，
都只能怪我们太年轻，承诺得太天真。
现实与梦想总有很大的距离，
一生奋斗为油盐茶米生活的舒适，
更别说上为别人而活的那几分之几。
当现实是那么的近距离时，
爱情已失去那种年轻时特有的魔力。

现在的我，只能理解爱情为，勉强不得。
我才二十岁。她已二十三。

病了

kv is sick.
回来多久就病了多久。
首先发高烧，然后泻肚子，然后吃什么呕什么，搞到我都不敢吃了。
明明很饿可是肠胃就是不肯吸收食物。
我现在是‘药桶’，看了三次医生拿了不懂多少种药，现在看到药就头晕。
我很饿！我要吃东西！不要呕出来！
谢谢小明的豆花~
我妈问我你是男是女做么名字叫小明~哈哈~